GOP To Sue President Obama: They Want Their FEAR Back

Senator Lindsey Graham and Tea Party favorite, Rand Paul, have jointly announced that the Republican Party will be bringing a lawsuit against President Obama for infringing upon, what they claim to be, their ‘Intellectual Property.’

To put it simply – they want their FEAR back.

The GOP has long known that the way to keep nearly half this country voting for Republican candidates, and against their own best interest, is fear. Over the years they have perfected scaring the fearful into thinking the Democrats will take away their guns, scaring the racists into believing the black Democrats will marry their daughters, the uninformed into thinking the Democrats will make Big Government tell them how many kids to have and how many cars to own, the ignorant into thinking that illegal Democrats will take away their jobs and the hypocritical into believing someone wants their stupid bibles.

Through the use of fear and lies (and the help of fear-mongers like Fox News and Rush Limbaugh), the Conservatives in America have made 47% of this country scream against ‘handouts’ – even when they, themselves, are on welfare. They’ve convinced 47% of this country to scream against ‘unions’ – even though they, themselves, are being paid poorly and treated worse. They’ve scared 47% of this country to shout against things like healthcare and better living conditions   – all while they are dying due to lack of healthcare and living like squatters.

In the years since Reagan, they have taught the Republican voter to yell against things like taxes, abortions and gay marriage – while teaching them to sit quietly concerning the richest not paying their fair share or sending our brave men and women off to a war based on lies.

They’ve found that if you just keep this 47% thinking that the Russians, or the Commies, or the Socialists, or the Muslims, or the Liberals or the Atheists, or the Gays – are out to get them (or that Jesus is coming sometime soon) – they will vote how you ask them to, each and every time.

But now, President Obama has drones. And when the White House has been asked if they will allow a drone to kill someone enjoying a coffee in a café (or, for some odd reason, Jane Fonda), they respond with uncomfortable silence. President Obama will not tell the American people, with complete and total certainty that the next time mom or pop America strolls into a Starbucks to drink an overpriced, fancy coffee beverage – they could be blown to bits without ever knowing why.

This scares the shit out of them!

To quote one such American, coffee lover, “This shit’s scarier than what could happen to my straight marriage if we let gay people marry!”

The latest polls have shown that those who opposed President Obama based on their fear of his being a Muslim, a Socialist or taking their gun away, are now starting to approve of the job he is doing as he is scaring them more than those other guys, who usually scare them the appropriate amount.

In related news, Rand Paul has also announced he is suing The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster for not compensating him when they created a character that he claims was based on his hair.


S. Bernstein is the creator of stuff, which can be seen at

Author: The Blue Route

What say you, the people?