When Cheney Dies

“You don’t go out and broadcast the fact that you’ve got the guy (bin Laden). You want to take that intelligence and be able to exploit it over the next few nights, and wrap up large parts of the network. They were in such a hurry to go out and announce victory, that I’m convinced that they probably did not get maximum damage out of the intel that they had captured.

~ Dick Cheney, weighing in on what Barack Obama got wrong in the killing of Osama bin Laden, October 24, 2013.

You know what’s ironic? If Dick Cheney were to drop DEAD tomorrow (just sayin’), President Obama would attend his funeral. He’d give a sincere eulogy, saying kind things on behalf of the deceased Sith. Not just because Cheney’s grieving wife and daughters were there, but because that’s the kind of guy Obama is. In stark contrast to the vile, hateful Dick Cheney, who can’t even give President Obama credit for eliminating the most hunted mass-murderer on the planet. And why is that?

Because Barack Obama provides contrast for gauging the Cheney/Bush era. Being tough on terrorism, foreign policy, economics, human rights, women’s rights, gay rights, you name it; Obama came along and had the audacity to be a competent president. How DARE he!? He rescued us from Cheney’s wars, Bush’s tanking economy, their failed “strategy” to protect America from terrorism (i.e. invading countries where terrorism didn’t exist), passed healthcare reform, saved the auto industry, etc., so his reward is this nonstop hate-fest we’ve witnessed since 2009.

When Dick Cheney dies, and that day can’t come soon enough for me, I promise to feign sorrow. Hell, I might even fly to wherever they inter him, shed a tear on his behalf and pour a little of my best 30-year-old scotch over his grave. But only after I’ve filtered it through my kidneys first.

Author: Bruce Lindner

What say you, the people?