A Children’s Book On American Politics: Run Spot Run

My name is Bob.  I have dog named Spot.  I have a friend named Mitch.  Mitch and I are good friends.  We play with Spot.  See Spot run.  See Mitch have fun.  I have another friend named Harry.  Harry is a good friend too.  He likes my dog Spot.  See Harry have fun.  Harry and Mitch don’t like each other.  Harry is a Democrat.  Mitch is a Republican.  I don’t know what that means.  Spot doesn’t either.

Harry thinks that Mitch is nuts.  Mitch thinks Harry is nuts.  I think that they are both nuts.  Spot doesn’t care.  We have lots of fun together.  We can’t play politics.  We don’t have fun when we play politics. I wonder what politics is. Spot doesn’t wonder about anything.

I have another friend named Barry.  Barry is black and white.  But not like Spot.  Spot is black and white too.  That’s why his name is Spot.  I don’t know why people say Barry is black and white.  He doesn’t have spots.  Sometimes Barry does things that I don’t like.  But I like him anyway.  Harry thinks that Barry is always right.  Mitch thinks that Barry is always wrong.  Spot doesn’t know.

Mitch thinks that Barry is ruining our playground.  Harry thinks Barry is saving our playground.  I think our playground is nice.  I think it could use some repairs.  Spot soils our playground.

I know a man named Rush.  Rush talks a lot.  He says things that cause lots of trouble.  He talks on the radio.  He doesn’t like anyone.  Rush makes lots of money.  I heard that Rush is a bloviater.  I don’t know what that means.  Spot doesn’t seem to care.

Rush likes Spot.  Spot likes everyone but Rush.  See Spot run from Rush.  See Spot have fun.  See Rush get rich.  See friends hate each other when Rush talks.

My friends know how to use their inside voices.  But when they play politics they use their outside voices.  My mother told me that this is rude.  When I play with Harry he is not rude.  When I play with Mitch he is not rude.  Rush is rude all the time.  Spot is never rude.  When Harry and Mitch play together they are rude to each other.  Barry never seems to be rude.  See Barry have fun.

Some people don’t like Barry.  I don’t know why.  Spot likes everyone but Rush.  I will go to school soon.  I hope I will learn why Harry and Mitch don’t like each other.  They say it is because of Barry.  I don’t believe them.  Barry never plays on our playground.  Spot plays everywhere.

I think Rush went to school.  He says things that I don’t understand.  Neither does Spot.  When Rush talks, Spot soils our playground.  I have fun every day.  Spot has fun every day.  Rush never seems to have fun.  Rush only seems happy when he is using his outside voice.  He ruins everyone’s fun.  See Rush get richer.

I wish that Rush would stop making everyone mad.  Mitch and Harry don’t like each other because of what Rush says.  I don’t understand.  Spot doesn’t care.  He likes most people.  He doesn’t like Rush.  Rush doesn’t care.  See Rush get richer and richer.  See Spot do that nasty thing on our playground.

My mother told me to be nice.  She said that I should never call people bad names.  See me being nice.  Rush calls famous people bad names.  See Rush get richer and richer and richer.  See Spot do that nasty thing on Rush.  See Rush blame that on Barry.  See Spot not caring.  See Mitch and Harry shouting at each other.  See Rush going to the bank.  See Rush leaving nasty stuff on the playground.  See the playground in ruins.  See me wondering what will come next. Run Spot Run.

Robert DeFilippis

Author: The Blue Route

What say you, the people?